


The Dangerous Spark of Hope

by ByTheAngell (SomeLittleInfamy)



Series: Tumblr Prompts [51]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hopeful Ending, M/M, background clace
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-03
Updated: 2019-05-03
Packaged: 2020-02-16 14:02:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18692986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SomeLittleInfamy/pseuds/ByTheAngell
Summary: He doesn’t know when he started crying again, only aware of the sobs that shake his body once he feels the hands of Isabelle and Jace on either shoulder, rising and falling with each shuddering breath. No one says anything for a while. What could they possibly say? What could comfort him in that moment, when they all know the reality of what just happened.The horrible weight of the sacrifice Magnus made for them.---Or, Alec allows himself to find comfort in hope.





	The Dangerous Spark of Hope

**Author's Note:**

> 3x20 coda, so spoilers ahead! 
> 
> Prompt: could you write a fic about clace and izzy comforting alec right after magnus gets taken?

Alec isn’t certain how long he kneels on the cold, stone floor. There’s a dull ache in his knees from the impact of his collapse… because that’s exactly what it was. He fell, losing not just the ability to stand but the will to. With Magnus locked away behind the rift that seals itself shut with flashes of blue stitching themselves across a sky of red, Alec can almost feel the physical disconnect of that separation. Like a piece of his soul was ripped away from him.

Maybe this was how Magnus felt without his magic. The loss of something that, in such a short time, became intrinsically bound to his happiness, his very sense of self.

He doesn’t know when he started crying again, only aware of the sobs that shake his body once he feels the hands of Isabelle and Jace on either shoulder, rising and falling with each shuddering breath. No one says anything for a while. What could they possibly say? What could comfort him in that moment, when they all know the reality of what just happened.

The horrible weight of the sacrifice Magnus made for them.

For him.

“Alec…” Jace speaks first, his voice quiet and rough, choked with barely hidden emotion at the sight of his brother like this.

Alec doesn’t look up at them. He doesn’t see Clary’s own arm reach around Jace to comfort him as he comforts Alec, or the panicked look asking for help that Jace shoots at her over Alec’s head. But Clary can’t make Jace feel any better about this situation with a touch as much as Jace can’t for Alec, and Isabelle is at just as much of a loss as the other three.

It’s Alec who speaks next.

“He’s gone.”

Alec looks down, unable to lift his head, only to catch sight of the glimpse of silver on his left hand that wasn’t there mere minutes ago. He brings his right hand over to touch it, fingers resting on either side to twist it ever so slightly in place, not wanting to risk it falling off and certainly not daring to remove it entirely. The cold metal beneath his fingertips grounds him.

His gaze finally lifts back up to where the rift in the sky was, but no longer is. The last traces of Magnus’ magic fade from the sky but the ring on his finger still feels warm with the the undercurrent of it.

“I’m so sorry, Alec.” Isabelle says with a squeeze of pressure on his shoulder.

“Me too,” Clary adds. “What he did…” her voice trails off, unable to find the words. She tries again. “Are you alr--?” but winces, cutting herself off. “Of course you aren’t. I’m sorry…”

“What can we do?” Jace cuts her off, thankfully. Alec would never fault her for just trying to help, for trying to comfort him, but she was digging herself a pretty deep hole the longer she spoke and he doesn’t think he’s in the frame of mind not to snap at her if she says the wrong thing.

“What do you need?” Isabelle asks.

The questions are exactly what he expects from his siblings. They know him - they know that he doesn’t want to talk about his feelings, but rather the problem at hand and fixing as much as possible as quickly as possible. Alec’s always been a doer: he doesn’t want to talk about why he feels helpless, he wants to find out how to stop feeling that way.

He has to.

“I don’t know.” And it’s true. For the first time in a very long time, he has to plan. No strategy. He closes his eyes and instead of the perfect course of action manifesting behind his eyelids all he sees is a dark void.

“What Magnus did - it saved all of us. We can take care of the demons that are left without any more taking their place.” Jace hesitates, considering his next words carefully, before adding them. “You know as well as I do that if he stayed he just would’ve died along with us.”

It’s blunt, but that was always the way they got through to one another in moments like these. Honesty, however painful, to put the situation into perspective. It’s exactly the sort of thought that snaps Alec out of his previous wallowing haze.

He knows he can’t stay on the ground forever and leans back onto the balls of his feet before pushing himself upright. Jace and Izzy’s hands never leave his shoulders, supporting him when he gives the slightest waver on the way up.

There are still fresh tears escaping no matter how hard he tries to keep them back, and the moment Isabelle catches sight of them she wraps her arms around him and buries her head into his chest, dampening his shirt with her own tears. He resists for just a moment or two before ducking his head down, burying it in the soft, floral scent of her hair, taking comfort in it as the air around them fills with smoke and ichor.

Izzy’s just as tough as he and Jace are - more so, probably, though you’d rarely think to realize it, because where her brothers remain stubbornly stoic she always knows the exact moment to drop the facade and let some of those emotions through. This is exactly what Alec does. He was trying to control it, trying to keep the worst of it at bay so he could stand up and snap himself right back into dealing with the problem at hand. Except the problem at hand, for him, is no longer just the demons in Alicante.  

 _His_ problem is the whole of Edom and the fiance he has trapped there. And it feels so much more important than cleaning up this mess even though he knows it shouldn’t.

So he gives in to Izzy, indulging the both of them by allowing himself this moment to properly break down now that Magnus is gone and no other Shadowhunters are in sight besides the four of them. Jace wraps an arm around them from the side, and Alec’s breathing steadies with the comforting pressure of his siblings’ arms around him.  

They only break off of him when he shifts himself back and forth a bit to signal he wants to move again. His eyes are still wet, the skin around them red, but no new tears fall. His shoulders rise and fall with slightly strained breaths, but no longer shudder with sobs.

“You’re going to be alright, Alec. We’re here for you.” Jace promises, and while Alec isn’t so sure about the first part he doesn’t doubt the second part for a moment.

“Thank you,” he says, knowing the words aren’t enough. But just as much as Izzy and Jace are finding it impossible to find the right words to comfort him after his boyfriend sealed himself into the demonic realm, Alec finds it impossible to find the words to thank any comfort offered to him that isn’t Magnus back in front of him. He can’t process that he’s gone despite saying the words earlier. He can’t accept that this is it, that this is the only way to close and hold the breach.

“We’ll get him back, Alec. Don’t worry.”

His head snaps over at Clary’s words. She doesn’t get it. She doesn’t understand how these things work, still new and learning about the Shadow World despite all the power and influence she has over it. He knows he can’t blame her for realizing that Magnus can’t just portal back from this without the rift re-opening behind him, but he does. For a moment, he starts to get angry.

“It isn’t that simple, Clary-” Jace starts to explain, but Alec cuts him off.

“Just because you keep showing up and waving your stele around with today’s latest Mystery Rune to fix whatever problem--” but the words stop themselves short. He thinks of her rune to summon Lilith from Edom. He thinks of her portal rune. Of her resurrection rune. He thinks of every rune Clary’s ever been given a vision of that seemed impossible at the time…

...and for the first time since Magnus left, he thinks there might _actually_ be a way to get him back.

“Sorry. I-” Alec starts, but Clary’s already shaking her head dismissively.

“It’s fine,” Clary says, meeting his gaze hesitantly. “If it wasn’t for me, you could’ve stopped Jonathan sooner. And I helped him get the sword, and now…” she sighs. “I’m going to help you fix this. Whatever it takes, alright?”

They’re looking out at the demons still attacking in droves, but Alec knows when Clary looks back at him with the smallest nod of a promise that she isn’t just talking about helping him rid Alicante of the demons.

Alec nods back.

“Let’s go. We have work to do.”

And this time when his hand reaches over to touch the ring on his finger, it doesn't flood him with the sorrow of loss, but rather a spark of hope that courses through him like magic, fueling his first determined steps forward out of the room.

**Author's Note:**

> ( Find me on [Tumblr](http://bytheangell.tumblr.com) and also on [Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/By_The_Angell) while we all hang out waiting for someone to #SaveShadowhunters ! <3)


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